The Magic of Christmas

With Christmas less than 10 days away, Santa is the topic of many conversations in our house. Madeleine, at 2 years 9 months, is very aware of Santa, his reindeer, and all of the grandeur that comes with the holiday. I feel somewhat like a child again as well because, through her, I see the sparkle in everything. There is a glimmer in her eyes that I don't ever want her to lose, and therefore, I welcome every endless question about Santa and his elves. With all of this Christmas talk, I wonder about how to keep the magic alive but also make the holiday more than gifts, and money, and all the materialism. I realize that my children are young, and that the explanations cannot become too complex at this time because they don't have the capacity to fully understand the religious aspects associated with Christmas. But, I feel I do have a responsibility to tell them something beyond the tradition of Santa. I guess I can start by focusing on the importance of giving rather than receiving. Luckily, there is a joy that comes with giving, even at Madeleine's age, that is unparalleled to anything else. I have to admit -- I like opening presents -- but I do find it so satisfying and exciting to buy someone the perfect gift. There's nothing like seeing sheer joy on a face and know that you're the reason for that joy. It feels good and it's addicting, and I wish I had the money to do it all year long.

I am contradicting myself, though, because my purpose is not to show Madeleine that gifts are the focus of Christmas. For me it really is the entire celebration that I love. It's my favorite time of year, and the gifts don't have much to do with that. I love having excuses to get together with family and friends, to enjoy meals together and sip delicious wine. I love the Christmas music, the smell of the Christmas trees, the lights on the houses. After feeling such gratitude at Thanksgiving for health and happiness, I'm reminded again of how lucky I am to have everyone around me that I do. This is what I want to pass on to my children -- a sense of appreciation for what we're blessed to have and an enthusiasm for what's ahead. My parents instilled this in me through our own holiday traditions and maybe that's why Christmas is such a special time for me.

We only truly see the magic in the world for such a short period of our lives, and it's my job to let my children truly relish in that now. My concern that materialism is going to play too large of a role is unfounded, because I have to remember that at this age, kids don't care if they get 2 presents or 20 presents -- the joy really comes in seeing the lights on the tree and hanging the ornaments on the branches (or, pulling them all off as in Owen's case). I know Madeleine is much more excited about the idea of leaving milk and cookies out for Santa than she is for what Santa is bringing her. Such innocent and simple pleasures!

This Christmas and for many more to come, for her sake and for mine, I'll do my best to create this magic and believe in it, too.

When it rains, it pours.

The last week has felt like four excruciating weeks rolled into one. Things are always hectic right now with two small children, but at least they are usually somewhat predictable. It's amazing how quickly things can change! It all started with Madeleine's never-ending drippy nose escalating into congestion accompanied by a violent cough. The next day she had a fever and was basically cranky and miserable when I noticed some green discharge coming out of one eye. Within a couple of hours, her eye got much worse and then the other eye started crusting over. I knew it had to be conjunctivitis but I let the doctor confirm my suspicion that afternoon. Two days later - still suffering the same symptoms - she ended up screaming for an hour straight because of pain in her left ear. Thank God the pediatrician's office is only 2 blocks away (and for health insurance). We went back again so the doctor could take a look in her ears and also got another prescription for the conjunctivitis that had inevitably spread to Owen's eyes. That night, after finally getting the kids down, I thought Keith and I would be able to take a well-deserved break and enjoy a glass of wine. But instead, we got a call from Keith's dad saying that his grandmother had passed away. She had been sick for quite a while, and at 89 years old she had lived a full life, but no one is ever prepared for the death of a loved one. The evening's mood became somber (rightly so) and the focus shifted to finding a flight to Chicago for Saturday, which was only three days away, so Keith could be with his family for the funeral. My mom says that all things, good and bad, come in threes. She's right fairly often, but I was hoping she would be wrong in this case.

On Friday morning, we got our answer. Just before 6 am we woke up to Owen gasping for air. We rushed into his room and found him struggling to breathe. There wasn't too much time to think -- we knew he needed a hospital -- so I grabbed shoes and drove as fast as possible (running a red light) to get him to the ER. Keith stayed home with Madeleine. When we arrived at UCLA Santa Monica, the ER doctor and nurses acted quickly. They gave him a steroid shot, oxygen, and medicine he inhaled through a tube I held around his nose and mouth. As you can imagine, he was frantic during all of this which made his coughing and breathing even more labored. The diagnosis was croup. I know most parents reading this are familiar with croup; it's an inflammation of the vocal cords that causes a "barking" cough. It can be serious because the swelling of the throat can lead to complete blockage of the airway, which is what almost happened to Owen. He was in bad shape when we arrived and the doctor told me there was a good chance he'd have to stay the night but luckily, after six hours his breathing had improved enough for him to be discharged. I've never wanted to leave a place more.

Keith left the next morning to Chicago and I took care of our two run down kids for the weekend. Although I could have used his help at home, we both knew the only place for him was in Illinois with his family. He was able to say goodbye to his grandmother and, I'm so relieved to say, within a couple of days we were able to say goodbye to the kids' sicknesses.

I've spent a lot of time focusing on everything that went wrong lately, when only a few weeks ago it was Thanksgiving and I said I would make a point of counting my blessings more often. What I've learned from this experience is that just as quickly as things turned upside down for us, I know they'll turn right-side up again. In many ways they already have.

On Sunday, I signed a new client that I'm really excited about working with. She's a young, working mom with a beautiful 15 month old daughter, and she has already agreed to train for a 5K. My business is growing and I'm so fortunate to meet fascinating people as a result. Based on mom's prediction, I just experienced the first of three good things that are going to happen. So if I look at it that way, things are definitely on the up-swing.